Activation time: 5/5
Best Dosage Score: 4
Head High Medium
Body High Medium
Honestly, an overall score of 4 out of 5 is pretty lenient. I almost feel personally wronged by these pre-rolls — as we all do by sub-par products from brands we’ve come to count on for impressive results.
Still, it’s not like I’m exactly heartbroken. I just think that Burnwell needs to heed this warning and start taking pre-rolls seriously. They aren’t a throwaway product — some people really like pre-rolls and can’t do without them.
These flimsy, trim-filled roll-jobs from high-school, however, are wrapped in rice or wood pulp paper. They don’t smell particularly good — since they’re quite obviously made from trim.
First of all, the packaging is horrendous. Five fat pre-rolls are sloppily tossed in a box much too large. They jiggle around like Mexican jumping beans as you handle the low-grade cardboard packaging Burnwell claims is at least sustainable.
It’s funny — I know of another brand that uses black cardboard packaging: Secret Nature CBD. Yes, it’s a hemp company, but yes, they also make the best pre-rolls I’ve ever smoked.
I’m so glad I have a rubric to which I can compare these Burnwell pre-rolls. Otherwise, I might have thought they were passable.
But no. If a CBD company can make flawless, organic, all-hemp pre-rolls but a THC producer can’t, there’s wrong at work in the wide world of cannabis. I really, truly appreciate Burnwell’s commitment to sustainability and organic production methods.
Really, though, would it kill you guys to spend 30% more to at least enclose your disappointingly shoddy pre-rolls in a tailor-fit container?
All I can say is …man. It was a pain smoking even one of these.
I’d like to say Burnwell’s overall high quality made up for the almost absurd low quality of these pre-rolls, but I’m afraid that isn’t the case.
Before I actually lit up a Burnwell Chem Cookies Pre Roll and inhaled, I thought there was still a chance I was wrong about these joints. Keep in mind that I had to considerably bend my principles just to overcome the white papers enough to inhale — hemp paper is brown, making it immediately easy to distinguish.
If I didn’t know that Burnwell produces organic, indoor-grown flower, I’d be concerned about my health after smoking these joints. No, the flower my Burnwell Chem Cookies Pre Rolls contain is indeed organic and grown indoors with additional sunlight from greenhouse skylights — thankfully.
There’s always a silver lining. One thing you can’t mess up in a pre-roll is a simple equation:
Cannabinoids + Combustion + Inhalation = Bloodstream Absorption in Healthy Adults
So, the Burnwell Chem Cookies Pre Roll 5-Pack checks the boxes as far as this category is concerned. And, to be honest, it’s not like I hate these admittedly disappointing joints.
It’s mainly that I’m disappointed in Burnwell as a brand. I don’t think this will be a permanent state — as Burnwell gains popularity, it’s likely that new talent and new perspectives will hone the rough diamond this Columbia Basin cannabis producer has stumbled upon into a multifaceted treasure.
It could be general dysphoria regarding the product clouding my assessment. Still, I feel like even the effects of my Burnwell Chem Cookies Pre Roll were reduced by the low quality of the plant material (and, by the way, I haven’t smoked any more of my pack).
Perhaps it’s also due to the fact that Chem Cookies is a thoroughly unremarkable strain. I’m not saying it’s bad — I’ve had the strain and some of its variants before. Still, Chemdawg, Chem Cookies, and their ilk are decidedly hybrid with no distinguishing sativa or indica traits.
Suffice to say that I wasn’t all that impressed by the effects of my Burnwell Chem Cookies Pre Roll 5-Pack either. Nothing worth docking more than a point for, but still worth noting by removing that single point from what would otherwise be a perfect score.
It’s not like I paid a lot for my five pre-rolls, but I still feel like anything would be too much for the single pre-roll I managed to smoke without hacking up a lung. The price I paid for this 3.75g 5-pack would seem a lot more reasonable if the pre-rolls inside attained to Burnwell’s usual standards of quality.
It seems like Burnwell is targeting its products toward budget smokers. Yet, the pricing is sky-high for what’s ultimately nothing but low-tier leftover biomass.
I would honestly caution you against smoking these pre-rolls at all. Since each joint contains close to a gram of flower, however, you might want to limit yourself to half a joint if you do decide to dive into the deep end of Burnwell Chem Cookies’ bizarrely disappointing flavor.
Here are a few answers to common Chem Cookies and Burnwell questions:
Chem Cookies is very similar to the legendary strain Chemdawg, making it natural to wonder if these strains are similar. The honest truth is that both Chem Cookies and Chemdawg are decidedly hybrid in their genetics — the strain doesn’t even lean one way or the other, it’s strictly 50/50.
3. Are Burnwell pre-rolls good?
I’m sad to say it, but no. As pre-rolls go, they’re terrible.
Are they the worst pre-rolls ever? No way. But, they don’t meet the standards set by other products from the same brand. It’s pretty clear Burnwell considers its pre-rolls a throwaway product used to get rid of excess trim.
If that’s the case, why are these joints so expensive?
Before the committee gets their hands on the product and formally rates it, the BestDosage team scrapes the product packaging, scours the internet, and occasionally calls the brand directly to hunt down the most accurate information about each product.
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